after a week off.....back on the menu planning horse

last week i actually had a plan but it was written on a paper napkin on the counter :) but friends, i am back in the saddle again. i don't actually think any of you read these but that is okay--it is a good spot for me to keep my recipes and a plan to keep me on track!

**follow links for the recipes :) 

sunday:  easy dinner of “Make Pizza” (Little Caeser's kit from a student fundraiser), strawberries and canteloupe (i put a splash of cranberry pear white balsamic on my fruit--YUMMY) 

monday:Turkey Kielbasa, sesame broccoli, Fruit, Cous Cous

tuesday: Garlic Shrimp Linguine and Bread

wednesday: Roast beef sandwiches with au jus (sauteed peppers/onions), chips, Fresh green beans

thursday: Grilled pork medalions (marinaded in a store bought marinade), Wild rice, roasted asparagus

friday: Italian Style Grilled Steak, Baked Potatoes, Corn

Saturday: Date night? 

Sunday: Fajitas (chicken and veggies), black beans on the side, tortilla chips  (**make simple tomato sauce for Monday)

monday: spaghetti with simple tomato sauce

tuesday:  Baked chicken (with italian bread crumbs), broccoli, tomato torte

Italian Grilled Steak
Giada’s Rib-Eye Steaks with Smoky Arrabiata Sauce
1 3-inch serrano pepper
1 28-ounce can crushed tomatoes
1 small onion, coarsely chopped
2 cloves garlic, peeled and crushed
1 tablespoon capers, drained, rinsed and coarsely chopped
1 tablespoon sugar
2 ½ teaspoons smoked paprika
1 tablespoon kosher salt, plus extra for seasoning
2 one-pound ribeye steaks, each about 1-inch thick
2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
1 ½ teaspoon kosher salt
½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
Remove stem and half the seeds from pepper; coarsely chop. Pulse pepper and next 7 ingredients in a food processor until mixture is chunky. Bring tomato mixture to a boil over medium heat; reduce heat and simmer 25 minutes or until thickened. Salt to taste. Cover and keep warm.
Heat grill pan or skillet over medium-high heat or preheat grill to 350-400 degrees. Drizzle each side of steak with olive oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Grill 5-6 minutes on each side for medium-rare. Cover steaks and let stand 5 minutes. Slice steaks across the grain into ¼-inch slices and serve with sauce.

Simple Tomato Sauce
**my mom in law made it and said to cook it all day--therefore i am cooking it on a sunday :)

Ingredients

• 1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil
• 1 small onion, chopped
• 2 cloves garlic, chopped
• 1 stalk celery, chopped
• 1 carrot, chopped
• Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 2 (32-ounce) cans crushed tomatoes
• 4 to 6 basil leaves
• 2 dried bay leaves
• 4 tablespoons unsalted butter, optional

Directions

In a large casserole pot, heat oil over medium high heat. Add onion and garlic and saute until soft and translucent, about 2 minutes. Add celery and carrots and season with salt and pepper. Saute until all the vegetables are soft, about 5 minutes. Add tomatoes, basil, and bay leaves and simmer covered on low heat for 1 hour or until thick. Remove bay leaves and check for seasoning. If sauce still tastes acidic, add unsalted butter, 1 tablespoon at a time to round out the flavors.
Add half the tomato sauce into the bowl of a food processor. Process until smooth. Continue with remaining tomato sauce.
If not using all the sauce, allow it to cool completely and pour 1 to 2 cup portions into freezer plastic bags. This will freeze up to 6 months.

control

control. control. control.
since it was brought up at my therapy appointment on monday, i have given a lot of thought to control. the need to control things definitely impacts my anxiety.  it hit me head on yesterday. let me digress and share.

jack has been sick for over a week. he was diagnosed with strep last tuesday and missed school both tuesday and wednesday. we sent him back last thursday with a non-existent low grade fever only to have him return home from school with a real fever. he was home again friday....saturday, sunday, monday, tuesday, and wedensday. during those days, he continued to have a swollen foot (immune response to strep), a low grade to regular fever and general malaise. we sent him back to school thursday. thursday my anxiety hit me head on. thursday i worried about my five year old. would he be okay at school? would he run a fever. would he be sick? then i started to think about the bus, which is one of my own phobias, and the anxiety moved from hitting me on the head to taking over my brain. all i could think about was my small child sitting on the bus with a full blown fever and some sort of vomit occurring, his own or someone elses. you have to remember that vomit is another one of my phobias. as school ended, i rushed out to my vehicle and started to head for home...quickly. unconsciously, i took the route that drove right past jack's school. as i realized this, i also realized that my brain was filled with these thoughts....the fevers, the bus and the vomit. i so badly wanted to stop at jack's school. i wanted to scoop him up off of that bus and deliver him "safely" home in the truck. i wanted to "help" him. but the farther i drove away from school, and pondered all of this, i could hear my conversation with josh from monday evening. i heard us as we chatted about my anxiety and the things that cause it. i heard control. i heard myself say that i am tired of anxiety and the negative physical responses it brings. i heard myself say that i am ready to take control of my anxiety instead of it controlling me. and it hit me. i could not control jack's situation. i could not control him. by picking him up, it would not HELP him in the future. by controlling his immediate situation, it would not strengthen him. it would not help him learn. it would not help him deal with "unpleasantness" in the future (not to mention  there was NOTHING wrong with him.....he did not have a fever, the bus ride was fine, there was no vomit...etc.). by controlling his situation, i would not be doing anything but letting anxiety CONTROL me!  i am adamant that i do not want my own flaws, i.e. anxiety, to negatively impact my children. i do not want them to pick up flaws (and the humor in me ....they will have to find their own flaws :)).  so i did the right thing. at that moment, i took control of my anxiety. i drove past jack's school. i swallowed my fears of bus trips gone wrong with puke and fevers. i drove on. i drove on and felt good.

i am not in control yet. (ironic isn't it...... control creates anxiety yet i need to control my anxiety to get back to me....i need to find a new word for control...so help me out with that, eh). but that small step was in the right direction. swallowing the need to control the situation was hard but worth it.


i am proud of me.

back to the 80s

i am convinced my children were born in the wrong decade. they are truly children of the 80's :) need evidence?

*they are my children. the day i got out of the hospital, my parents took me to our family business--the spot ROLLER rink. yes that is right. may something 1980 i was already rocking out to great 80's music.

*they are in love with any music by bon jovi. their very favorite song is you give love a bad name.....at least once daily they race through the house belting out "shot through the heart your to blame you give love a bad name"

*we recently watched some 80's music videos on youtube and they want the hair....you know which hair i am talking about....BIG long man hair

*jack has asked if bon jovi can be he dad.....his other dad since he already has one

*they love to wear athletic sweatbands around their heads while playing soccer

*they LOVED transformers the cartoon movie....and were OBSESSED with the great rockin' out 80's music (you've got the touch; you've got the Pooooowwwweeerrrrrrrrr) that was belted out 

*they giggled at weird al yankovich on the movie

*they love LOVE love any "old" cartoon we get from netflix......duck tales anyone?

well that proves it friends--my boys are a few decades late :)

a jump, a leap, moving forward

i made a jump today. i moved forward, took a leap of faith and went to my first therapy appointment in 2 years..... yikes! did i just say the dreaded th word?!? woah and did i say it, hushed tones, out loud!??! YES i DID! i said it! and damn that feels good to say it!

there are a few parts of my session today that keep coming back to me..... so in no particular order.....

**real. this word continues to come up for me. she asked if my colleagues and friends know the real teresa. that question made me pause and think. my first response and the one i gave her was no. i do not think anyone, except josh truly knows me 100%. and then as i got home, i continued to ponder that question and thought. i have a few things that have hit me. 1. should anyone truly know me better than josh....and my response to that is no :) he is the love of my life. the one who is my everything. the one who completes me. he is the one who should know me 100%+. 2. a lot of people know me.....and i truly think know the real me and perhaps know me better than i think they do. and isn't that okay? i am not sure i want others to know me 100%....we all carry around a lot of baggage...well at least i do and who wants to know all of my baggage all the time? i do think i have wonderful friends and they get the real teresa....or at least the real that i show.

**control. she asked me what i think triggers my anxiety. i was stumped. we talked through my phobias and how i just recently realized that my phobias are triggered by my uncontrolled anxiety. she pointed out that by having phobias i am actually "controlling" my anxiety. my brain has an outlet and something controllable to worry about. i had not really through of it that way but it made sense. so i got home and was talking to josh about all of this and it hit me--i think control is what triggers my overall anxiety--lack of control. as josh and i talked about this as well we got into the differences between worry and anxiety. to me worry is short. it is temporary and does not cause a physical reaction. anxiety on the other hand is longer and causes a physical reaction. worry tends to be about things that can't be controlled but it quickly dissipates. anxiety is about things that can't be controlled but the feeling lingers and goes beyond what "normal" worry it.

so it took me almost an hour to write this nonsensical blog. i have a feeling it does not make any sense and it was very hard for me to write. i would write a tiny bit and then find something "better" to do online....read, fb, scrabble, etc. i feel like that is telling of me. of who i am. i want to get my anxiety under control. i want to be more "balanced" but at the same time, it is hard to just focus on me and doing this. 

thanks for listening.

b^$*#

the boys and i had a date tonight.  i was having a lovely conversation at pizza hut tonight with my two boys when jack announced to us that he heard a naughty word. i smiled and in my head chuckled because we have had a lot of those conversations lately and the words are "poop" or "pee". i smiled at him and said, oh yeah buddy...what did you hear. jack responded LOUDLY BIT#$--what!?!?!? my sweet little five year old just said witch with a b?!?! i did not panic (i repeat, i did not panic) even as luke tried to repeat the word. i calmly looked at him and prodded for more information....where did you hear that buddy? who told you that word? and YES it is a naughty word! and besides telling me that you heard a naughty word from someone else, i do not ever EVER want to hear that word or any just as naughty come out of your mouth. luke piped in that he will never say pinch either and that pinch is just as naughty as poop or pee :) jack agreed he would remain quiet and he was horrified that he heard such a naughty word from his friend.

i hope we stay this sweet--i am going to do everything in my power to keep us this sweet because i  love my sweeties!

prayers for a friend

a week ago selma township fire deptartment lost another member--their beloved friend and "brother" suffered full cardiac arrest and passed away at the tender age of 42. darold was a friend of my brother's and a classmate when they studied to become emts. darold and his fiance jenn were there for my family when tom died. they were there with support, food and comfort. jenn's entire family has supported my parents in the past 16 months and continue to do so.

jenn is struggling. the love of her life was taken from her. she is angry and rightfully so. i was so angry when tom died, and he was "just" my brother...not the love of my life. it is okay to be angry and even healthy to be so. it is good to cry. to grieve. to share. to be lost for a while. but when the time is right, the time for her, it is okay to be happy again. it is okay to smile and laugh. it is okay to love. i suppose in a way as i type for the prayers for jenn, so she can go through this process and come out with smiles, i am asking for the same for me. most days are happy. most days i am full of love and smiles. but some days are darker than others and i still need your prayers and support.

thanks for listening.

strep....of the foot?

odd but true. yes. that is what i said. strep....in jack's little foot! turns out, jack did not damage his foot as we had thought. instead, turns out that he has strep throat and he is having an immune response to it in his foot. it really shouldn't surprise us.... for starters jack-o tends to have quite a few odd things happen to him and secondly, he gets strep in his tummy so it should not surprise us that he has strep that has impacted another part of his body! 

luke came home from daycare with......suspenseful music here....a fever! :) a phone call to the doctor and to luke's delight, no appointment but rather a "scription" called in for him too.

i sure do enjoy this roller coaster we call life :)

weekly menu and recipes

Sunday: fresh salmon, wild rice, fruit salad (fresh berrries) and crusty bread

Monday: spaghetti, salad and garlic bread

Tuesday:  pork loin, baked potatoes, and broccoli

 

Wednesday:  out? or popcorn shrimp :)

Thursday: dripping roast beef sandwiches with provolone (see below)

Friday: a meeting for tb--find your own dinner night :)

Saturday: A DATE for Lynda's birthday 

Sunday: Hockey game to celebrate Lynda's birthday--with our entire family :) 

Monday: Chicken Patties over Salad 

Tuesday: Grilled Mardinaded Pork loin chops (with Tuscan Sundried Tomato), Roasted Potatoes/Sweet Potatoes, and Fruit Salad or frozen brocoli 

Wednesday: Garlic Shrimp Linguine (YUMMY) (see below) 

Dripping Roast Beef Sandwiches with Melted Provolone (new recipe for me)

Prep: 5 minutes

Cook: 5 minutes

Bake: 3 minutes

Serves: 4

Ingredients:

1 can (10 1/2 ounces) Campbell's® Condensed French Onion Soup

1 tablespoon reduced sodium Worcestershire sauce

3/4 pound thinly sliced deli roast beef

4 Pepperidge Farm® Classic Soft Hoagie Rolls with Sesame Seeds

4 slices deli provolone cheese cut in half

1/4 cup drained hot or mild pickled banana pepper rings

Recipe Tips:

Easy Substitution: You may substitute 1/2 of a 11.25-ounce package Pepperidge Farm® Texas Toast (4 slices), prepared according to package directions, for the rolls in this recipe. Serve the sandwiches open-faced.

 

 

Garlic Shrimp LInguine

8 oz. (1/2 of 16-oz. pkg.) linguine, uncooked

1/4 cup  KRAFT Roasted Red Pepper Italian with Parmesan Dressing

3 cloves garlic, minced

1 jar  (26 oz.) spaghetti sauce

3/4 cup matchlike carrot sticks

3/4 lb.  cooked cleaned large shrimp

2 Tbsp. KRAFT Grated Parmesan Cheese

2 Tbsp.  chopped fresh basil

Make It

COOK pasta as directed on package.
MEANWHILE, heat dressing in large saucepan on medium-high heat. Add garlic; cook 1 min. Add spaghetti sauce and carrots; cover. Reduce heat to medium-low; simmer 5 min. Stir in shrimp; simmer, uncovered, 5 min. or until carrots are tender.
DRAIN pasta; place on serving plate. Top with the shrimp mixture, cheese and basil.

o.p.s.photo shoot

i had the honor of doing a photo shoot for my little nephew! :)  here are a few of my favorites.....

a date a date a very important date

we had a date last night! yes a REAL date :) we even had a real sitter--not a grandma/grandpa but a real sitter. date nights are what keep our relationship strong and healthy. we went snowshoeing and chatted the entire time. ahhhhh soooo good for us. from there we went to see the mechanic. action flick all the way with nice eye candy. and then a yummy dinner of mexican food--perfect for us! and even better--we took the long long long way home so we had more time to talk and get home after the kids were in bed ;) 8:30 was the perfect time for us to get home....yes we are that early to bed kind of people :)

a date a date a very important date. i love my wonderful husband :)

muskgeon? england? whatever!

conversation at big boy tonight (yes i said big boy...do not judge us people. you do NOT live in the middle of no where.......)

jack, "hey dad, why do they call "something" "something""
dad, "i don't know jack...why do they call football football...you use your hands way more than your foot"
jack, "oh yeah. that is why they call it football in muskegon"
long pause
dad, "what?"
me, "you mean england, jack?"
jack, "oh yeah, england"
me, "and are you talking about soccer being called football"
jack with a smile, "yeah mom"

glad i get what he is talking about.

hey let's be real, we all confuse things like muskegon with england at least once in a while! :)

another menu update

Friday: el rancho :) 

Saturday: Garlic Shrimp Linguine(recipe below--YUMMY) Bread

Sunday: Super bowl subs, Veggie Tray, Fruit, Chips

Monday: Chicken Patties over Salad with Tator Tots for the boys 

Tuesday: Baked french toast with pecans and regular french toast and Fruit Salad

Wednesday: Chicken Parmesan, Asparagus

Thursday: Roasted Pork Loin, Roasted Potatoes and Sweet Potatoes, Fresh Green Beans 

Friday: Italian Style Grilled Steak (recipe to come), Baked Potatoes and Broccoli 

Saturday: Date Night 

Sunday: Blue Cheese Burgers 

Garlic Shrimp LInguine

8 oz. (1/2 of 16-oz. pkg.) linguine, uncooked

1/4 cup  KRAFT Roasted Red Pepper Italian with Parmesan Dressing

3 cloves garlic, minced

1 jar  (26 oz.) spaghetti sauce

3/4 cup matchlike carrot sticks

3/4 lb.  cooked cleaned large shrimp

2 Tbsp. KRAFT Grated Parmesan Cheese

2 Tbsp.  chopped fresh basil

Make It

COOK pasta as directed on package.
MEANWHILE, heat dressing in large saucepan on medium-high heat. Add garlic; cook 1 min. Add spaghetti sauce and carrots; cover. Reduce heat to medium-low; simmer 5 min. Stir in shrimp; simmer, uncovered, 5 min. or until carrots are tender.
DRAIN pasta; place on serving plate. Top with the shrimp mixture, cheese and basil.

a bit better

just a follow up to my previous post.

things were a bit better with the boys tonight. not 100% awesome but better..... however, jack-0 had a naughty day at school......but we had MAJOR discussion and hopefully worked all that out.

i wanted real....so here it is

it is them or is it me? mothering is hard lately and i am not even sure where to start.

seems like we are at tough ages again. 3 1/2 and 5 1/2. in our few years of parenting, we have seen a correlation between tough times/stages and half ages. perhaps it is coincidence but really it might not be.

i thought about writing the long and drawn out saga for what prompted this writing tonight but really do you need to hear the nitty gritty's of how our jenga game ended while josh was away weight lifting? instead, i will separate it out by factors...

factor 1: ages--half ages to us mean difficulties. both boys are working so hard to have independence yet so much is still so hard for them to do. luke is so jealous of the things jack can do and that leads to trouble. i also forget that they are so young..... i found myself the other day saying to luke (3.5)...."buddy come on now, act your age"..... he probably was.

factor 2: behavior--boy like stuff: hitting, shooting, muscle-ing, wrestling. it all starts out as good brotherly fun and go south....fast! luke tends to have extra aggression and his hands land on jack constantly and he is big....so therefore it hurts. as for me, i am struggling with my own behavior/emotions. who the heck knows what is going on. for a while now i haven been thinking that i should get back into see someone to work out my anxiety but that just never happens. i even emailed someone this week and called someone else to try and make an appt with either of them but heard from one that she is kind of full (and i know nothing about her) and the other (whom i had heard good things about) didn't call me back. a lot of the time i wish my anxiety disorder was not a part of my life......  sometimes i think it is not even my anxiety that makes me feel so agitated but rather just life. i am busy after all--juggling mom-hood, wife-dom, full time teaching and a pretty heavy grad class load. plus just being me to have fun and get some alone time. i seem to have pent up aggression as well from dealing with the boys and lately, it gets to a head and the boys get a swat.i hate giving swats--they are just that a swat--not a spank but i still hate it. i was spanked as a kid and didn't like it. i don't feel like i learned anything and therefore do not want to spank or even swat my boys...... but lately 1 out of 20 times or so, they get a small swat when they are not listening. 

factor 3: listening. the boys are not listening well to either of us. they hear but don't follow through. a lot. thinking just about today...i can give five examples where they did not listen to what i said....touching things at walmart, touching each other, setting the table, stop whining, etc. and it is not just not listening but hearing what we say and then being defiant about it and doing the opposite. is this an age thing? i don't know but i am frustrated by it greatly.

factor 4:  cooped-up-ness. we have had two snow days this week....yes we got out to play in the snow but all four of us were home for the entire two days. perhaps this has compounded our behaviors to a degree but the behaviors (not listening, hands on each other and sassing) have been happening for well over a week, maybe two.

factor 5: consequences and privileges. our old consequences do not seem to be working as well as they did before. in the past we have used: corner time, time out chair, and/or taking away privileges. recently, we have put them in their rooms. but again, nothing is really working. this is a hard one for me. tonight our issue happened right before bed so i put them in thei corner, then in their rooms (after a small swat) and told them no books (which i HATE and hurts my heart so bad since i love books and they do too). i have a hard time taking away snack....perhaps it is that food control in me so i gave them each five crackers and a half cup of milk but no choices at all. they were so sad. i am okay that they were sad but the question is, will it be enough to carry through to tomorrow. that is the other thing about consequences, it has to be MEANINGFUL and i am struggling to find that right punishment for the crime..... like when they don't listen, what would be a meaningful consequence?

factor 6: consistency. this speaks for itself. josh and i work really really hard to be consistent. are we? i don't know. 

factor 7: changes. i know it shouldn't matter for our kiddo's behavior but baby cousin was born this week. could that be impacting them? have i been different? can they feel that? can they feel that my hw is stressing me out?

holy cow. if you are still with me then kudos to you and thank you. in fact, if you got this far and are still reading, let me know, eh?

i know i am a good mom. i know josh is a good dad. it just seems like i am struggling with all of this right now and i don't know why. i am not even really looking for suggestions since i know this is something we just have to work out.

thanks for listening.

menu for the week....chicken alert--UPDATE

well since baby o.p.s. was born, meals changed!
previous menu

monday: baby born so we had buffalo wild wings
tuesday: on the road for appts so we all had random....i made the yummy buffalo chicken wrap when i got home :)
wednesday: chicken stir fry and homemade egg rolls (had extra time due to the snow day so made homemade...yummy! recipe at the bottom)
thursday: homemade chicken enchiladas--had extra time so made them today :) mmmmm recipe below
friday: ? pecan french toast?
saturday: ? chicken parmesan?
sunday: superbowl super subs, cheesy potatoes with ham, and snackies :) (fruits? veggie tray?)
monday....stay tuned!

homemade egg rolls
NEED:

Egg Rolls

YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY

got this off of a website and made it my own.....and LOVED them.

NEED:

2 tablespoons soy sauce
1 teaspoon corn starch 

finely shredded white cabbage (i bought pre-shredded in the produce section)--and i had even frozen it previously
chopped up bean sprouts--didn't have any on hand so skipped these
a bag of shredded carrots that i chopped up--partial bag in the fridge

egg roll skins found in produce section of grocery store

DO:

Mix soy sauce with corn starch. Set aside.


stir fry garlic a few seconds. add cabbage, bean sprouts and carrots. stir fry until cabbage wilts.


Add reserved soy sauce/corn starch and the vegetables. Cook 1 minute or so until thickened. Remove from heat and allow to cool a little.


Heat oven to 400 degrees.


Spray a cookie sheet with nonstick cooking spray.


Turn eggroll skin so it looks like a diamond. Put filling in center and follow the directions on the package to roll them up :) Mine were more flat....... I used water on my finger tip to "seal them".


Put the rolls seam side down on the pan.


Lightly spray the egg rolls with the nonstick cooking spray. Bake 15-20 minutes until golden brown.


I gave a quick broil at the end to crisp them a tiny bit more :)

 ENJOY--i had mine with duck sauce!

homemade enchiladas: 

NEED:
tortillas 

enchilada sauce (i prefer el paso mild) 

chicken 

cheese (shredded--i prefer the mexican blends) 

refried beans (optional) 

peppers and onions (optional) 

DO: 

**i did not have peppers or onions on hand so  i didn't use them--but if you do, saute them and add them to the chicken mixture before stuffing the tortillas

**i made some with chicken and some with just refried beans and cheese--added sauce to the beans

boil chicken 

spray dish with pam 

add a bit of sauce to the dish

shred with forks

add some enchilada sauce and cheese to shredded chicken--mix

roll into tortillas  

place in pan

pour sauce on top 

sprinkle with cheese

i let mine sit in the fridge overnight 

bake at 350 for about 45 minutes to an hour--i covered with foil for about 35 first. 

ENJOY :)

 

the blizzard of 2011

yes folks. that is right. we got a blizzard. cracks me up a tiny bit since up north, we used to get hammered hard all the time and my parents, who still live there, get hammered with snow constantly. but down here, us western michigananders are not so tough :) granted, the snow was THICK and the drifts were immense, so yes i guess we can say it was a lot of snow.  school was closed yesterday and closed again today--the side roads are not plowed yet so buses can't get through.

we have played in the snow
played with neighbors
played games
made valentine's day boxes
made cards for baby owen
cooked
been sassy and fought (boys...and maybe me)
eaten good food
played some more in the snow
ran
watched movies
we will have to see what else is in store for us today :)

how did you spend your snowpocalypse?