How could I forget this "Firsts"

One more HUGE "first" for Luke--his vocabulary is improving and expanding RAPIDLY! He has used MANY new words for the first time in the past week or two. My favorite is to hear him say "actually" :) He uses it often now and accurately. He also has used "remember" a lot and "borrow" and "accident"--I am impressed with how well he uses his new vocabulary :) It is so fun to hear him use new words for the first time!

Firsts

**Jack got his first progress report today from school (and first ever) :) He is doing well at school and had a good report!

**Our entire family got sick last week. This was the first time ALL four of us were ill at the same time--darn that H1N1.

**I have ordered a new laptop since my old one's mother board pooped out. This will be my first time to have a PINK lap top :)

**I was observed last week at school by the principal. It was my first observation in a classroom where I am team teaching (in fact this year is the first time I have ever team taught) and it went very well. It was huge for me when he asked, "Boyer, is there anything that you can't do?"

**Jack spent an entire day (albeit he was sick) playing LEGOS. This is the first time he occupied himself with an activity for a VERY lengthy amount of time.

**Luke has decided he is going to put himself to bed. This is the first time that he did not have to be asked to go to bed..... he now just says, I tired after we read (and tries to avoid teeth brushing) and climbs into bed to sleep. He has always gone to bed pretty good but we have always asked him to climb into bed. He now will come up to us before story time is over and tell us he is going to bed.

I am laying in my bed listening to Luke cry as he tries to fall asleep. I have been home with a fever and other nastiness today and the boys have started fevers since arriving home from daycare/preschool. Josh is taking care of all of us and has encouraged me to stay in our bedroom so I can recover faster. This scenario brings back memories of our life in MN. Jack was a very sick baby--very sick! In fact, we had him at the doctor over 36 times during the first year of his life. Two Thanksgivings ago, Jack went through a 20 day period where he was sick and seizured from his fever. Combine that with a bad case of Salmonella for Josh and having a 6 month old Luke, I began thinking of moving back to Michigan. That decision was sure made quickly for me and it was even easier to convince Josh. As we sold our house and got ready for the move, we went through more illness, including a week where I had Influenza A and both boys ran fevers along with intestinal issues. That really hit home for me that being back in MI with family is what needed to happen.

Now, we are back in Michigan and have family much MUCH closer. I am grateful for that. Even though my mom is not right here, knowing that she is an 1.5 hours away and could be here if I need her is HUGE. Knowing that my mom-in-law is just a few miles away and can be here in a heart beat if we need her to be, is HUGE! I am grateful that we were able to move back to MI.

Now I hope and pray that our illnesses are short lived. I pray that the students at my HS are getting better and continue to improve quickly (we have had a LOT out). I pray that Luke's little heart is happier soon and he is able to fall asleep. I pray that Jack does not seizure and we are able to figure out how best to care for both of the boys. I have been gone so much lately (homecoming events at the HS, etc plus grad school), that I think Luke is crying not from his fever but because he misses Momma. It hurts my heart that I cannot hold him right now. Josh is taking great care of all of us and I am so grateful for a wonderful and amazing husband!

Thanks for praying with me and listening to me ramble.

Morning Monopoly

Jack loves to play games :) In fact, he begs all the time to play them! This morning, I asked him if he wanted to play a Mom/Dad game and of course he did! He picked out Monopoly--something we had not played before. Here is a bit of how the game went:

Abbreviated Rules: each property cost "one money" (except Park Place and Boardwalk--those cost four monies). When you land on a property and owe money, you pay one money for one property. if you own two of the properties, you pay two monies...etc. If you have a house on the properties (which you do not have to own all three to buy houses/hotels) then you have to pay more monies.....depends on the color of properties to how much money is owed.

Luke played on and off--when he was not playing, he was giving out pretend candies and asking if we enjoyed them.

We had an absolute blast playing the game!!!! :)

Enjoying the Beauty

driving to grad class today, i was blessed to see the beauty our trees bring to western michigan! the colors were so vibrant as the morning sun steamed through the leaves and fog gently rested at the feet. what a glorious day to drive!

How Could I Forget?

golly gee! i have written about my phobia success with both frogs and school-puke-issues and i forgot to blog about BEST and to me, the most important, break-through I had recently!!!!

movies make me anxious--not watching them but going to the theater! i have irrational thoughts that creep into my brain...... i worked through this for the most part but i have my own personal limitations! i only like to go to movies with josh (irrational) or another adult. i also shy away from kid movies (okay shy away is not strong enough.....AVOID at all costs)....... long story short, i have not been to a kids movie in many years and i have never gone to a movie with Jack (luke had never been to one at all:))

on sunday, josh wanted to take jack and luke to a movie. he was sweet and said he would take them both if i did not want to go. well we actually decided luke was not going to go and josh would take jack alone for a daddy day. during jack's rest time on sunday, josh talked with him about the movie. jack asked if he could have mom take him to the movie....... and when i went in to tell him that i was staying home with luke, he tugged at my heart strings by saying, "that's fine mom. it will be okay with dad instead............" end result, i sucked it up and did what was best for our family and did not let my irrational fears get in the way. we, as a family, went to the movies. it was hard for me. i had physical reactions and definitely emotional ones but i worked very hard not to let the boys know it was going on with me. i made it through and enjoyed our family time.

thanks for listening!

Been a While

it has been a while :) i have been a bit busy between home life, homecoming/school life and grad school. i want to take a minute to give you an update that i am very proud of.

a few weeks ago i wrote about how proud i was with my phobias. i have come a long way with my frog phobia. another strong phobia i am working on reducing is my puke phobia. i know lots of people would agree with me that puke is disgusting--in fact, no one normal thinks it is great (my opinion.... :)) my phobia is not just a feeling that puke is gross. i have very strong physical, emotional and mental reactions when even thinking about a situation that might even remotely involve someone getting sick. let me provide you with an example: i get very anxious around amusement parks for the mere fact that someone might get sick near me. i also try to avoid busses, airplanes, cars with people i do not know, etc. this being said, on monday this week, a student of mine came up to me and asked to use the restroom. she did not look very good and was holding her stomach so i asked if she was okay. she said no and that she was going to throw up. she left the room and i looked at my colleague i team teach with. my colleague herself looked a bit anxious and worried so i offered to go check on our student. right now you are probably thinking, wow t--great job for volunteering....well don't say that just yet. i volunteered because someone needed to check on her and my colleague was doing the main portion of our teaching at that moment. it was only logical for me to go. i followed my student in and asked her gently if she was okay. she was not getting sick but felt awful so i walked her to the office and made sure her stuff got down to her. i cannot believe how calm i was! i didn't even get a physical reaction to following her in--in the past that would have made my heart race, my palms sweaty, my fight or flight quick in, etc. in fact, in the past i have "flown" from situations like that and gotten the heck out of there without a thought to the student who was not feeling well. i am proud of me.

thanks for listening. writing about my anxiety helps me. knowing that others have flaws they are working through also has helped me. thank you to my loving friends who have shared so freely with me.