Sisterly Bonding

over the weekend lynda and i attended a wedding in our home town. it was a wedding that as of a few months ago (8 to be exact) we probably would not have been invited to and also would not have attended if invited.....don't get me wrong, the bride and groom are lovely people but 8 months ago i did not really know them. see the groom and our brother were good friends. tom was his fire instructor and after that they became very close. in fact, when tom died, it was visits from tony and kristi, as well as kind words, that helped get us through the tough times. i might not have gotten to know them in the same way if tom had not died--in fact i can say with confidence that the relationship i have with t and k is unique because tom died. tom most likely would have been in their wedding and he would certainly have been a big presence at the wedding ( :-D ), lynda and i decided that we wanted to attend in his place and help the couple celebrate their big day. the evening had its ups and downs for me--it was awesome to be there--to celebrate a new marriage and to help unite them in holy matrmony--it was awesome to watch as they also had a family commitment ceremony to bring the step children in as a full part of the family and exchange rings with them as well. it was awesome to see tom's picture on the fire place mantle and know that he truly was there in spirit. it wasn't until after the tasty dinner and beginning portion of the recpetion that i started to slide down a bit in my spirits. i dance with both the bride and groom during the dollar dance and listened to tony talk about how much tom means to him still.....and then i talked to the best man who also shared how much he admired tom....and then i went to look at tom's picture on the mantle and that was too much for me. i had to excuse myself to the ladies' room for a bit. i sat and cried for a bit but was not alone. both lynda and tom's friend becky came in and the three of us cried together. we sat for a while and shared some hugs. lynda and i then went out and decided to have ourselves some fun--just like tom would have done! we danced the rest of the night away together and had an absolute blast. it was good to have time with lynda--to grieve and to celebrate this new marriage.

it was also fun to get dressed up :)

The Tractor

most of you already know....or have at least figured it out, luke is really REALLY into tractors...... really really really into them :) he has a pillow case that has various colors of tractors and at night while he falls asleep you can hear him talking to himself....."blue is ford, red is i dunno, orange is kubota, green in john deere...." :)

we head to a local flea market almost weekly--it is just part of our week--it is what we do. we don't usually spend a lot of money--a little bit here and there but usually on small toys, or fresh veggies/fruits. this past week however, we had a change....a big green change :) luke was wandering along and found a john deere ride on pushpull battery operated tractor just his size! i could not pass up the opportunity to get it for such a good deal so we brought it home with us :)

luke is in tractor heaven! he is a very happy boy to have such a neat toy and i am such a happy mom to finally have "leverage"......and a privilege that hurts when it gets taken away :)

luke's best buddy jacquelyn also came over to ride :) 

Ugly Cake

my husband is a master at baking--he can easily whip out homemade angel food cake, regular cake, tirimisu, etc......and they all taste and look wonderful! so his 30th birthday was approaching and i decided that i would show him how much i love him by making him a cake for his birthday---not just any cake but a decadent fudge chocolate cake. the picture looked amazing and the list of ingredients included four types of chocolate, butter AND crisco shortening so in my brain i figured it couldn't get much better than that! 

i worked so hard to create a masterpiece...lots of time to shop for the right ingredients, 30 minutes of prep, a hour and 30 minutes to bake.......but what i got is shown above :) it turned out to be an ugly cake that tasted so so....did not turn out to be the best cake in the world but it was certainly one that was filled with love :) i guess i really did show him how much i love him b/c i made him a cake even when it is hard for me :)

not wanting a picture....then all goofball on me :)

we made josh's day special by having a family birthday dinner over the weekend and then on monday (actual birthday) gave him his presents (jimi hendrix cd, nfl football guide, swim shorts, socks, and a colorado avalance t shirt), made him a fiesta for supper and ended with ugly cake :) we also made sure he had time to do what he wanted--batting practice for softball! all in all it was a great day! 

happy 30th birthday to the love of my life :)

Jack's Logic

according to jack:

3 + 3=6 but if the 6 is somewhere else (like in another number) then 3 + 3=5 :)

we say twenty-four and thirty-four so instead of fourteen, we should say ten-four!

love the logic!

Weekly Menu

Sunday: Make your own dinner

Monday: Josh's Birthday--Tacos and Taco Salad with

Black Beans

Cilantro Rice

Guac

Fruit

Chocolate Cake

Tuesday:skwered shrimp with Marinated tomatoes, Fruit Salad and Wild rice

Wednesday: Stromboli, Chips and Roasted Aparagus

Thursday: French Dip on Focaccia Rolls, Roasted Potatoes and Fruit

Friday: Grilled Marinated Pork Loin, Baked Potatoes, Grilled Veggie Skewers and Garlic Bread with Tuscan Romano Cheese

Saturday: BBQ Chicken Legs/Thighs, Tomato and Basil Salad, Corn on the Cob (?), Fruit

4^th of Jul--My Contribution: Bacon/cheeseMuffins and Strawberry/Blueberry Salad with Poppyseed Dressing 

Monday: Burgers on the Grill

Homemade Sweet Potato Fries http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/bobby-flay/garlic-and-herb-grilled-sweet-potato-fries-recipe/index.html and Fruit

Tuesday: Turkey Kielbasa, Wild Rice and Skwered Veggies

The Cheese "House"

country life at its best--a visit to the local cheese house where we got to watch cheese being made and then purchased the very same cheese curds!

we had heard through the grapevine that this cheese house was a neat little find so on monday of this week, the boys and i traveled the few miles over to check it out! we were pleasantly surprised to find a quaint shop full of yummy fresh cheese, along with free samples, and a huge viewing window. behind the glass were three huge vats of cheese in various stages of the process--one was drained and the curds were being "shoveled" and salted before being molded, one was just starting to cook and one was getting its acid level tested to see if the cheese was ready to cool (and then we got to watch it get cooled, etc). there were milk crates for the boys to stand on so they could see everything first hand! we also peeked through the doors to see the trucks pull up with the metal canisters of milk. turns out that many local amish farms bring in fresh milk to make this cheese.

we stayed close to 45 minutes and enjoyed every minute of our visit--as crazy as it sounds, i think we will be heading back for another cheese house visit! :)

Our Getaway

We have now been married for 8 years--I can count on just a few fingers the actual times we have taken time to JUST OURSELVES for a vacation.....a tiny tiny tiny honeymoon in 2002 (what 21/22 year old has $$ to take a big trip after paying for a wedding), a 10 day road trip to colorado in 2004 and now a 2 1/2 day getaway in 2010.... :)

we are blessed to have wonderful friends who graciously lent us their cottage in beautiful northern michigan. the wotila's have been a huge part of my life for almost 20 years--our friendship began when i was 12 or 13 and started as their children's babysitter :) we have progressed since then....and the "children" are now 19 and 21 :) okay on to how we spent our time......

highlights:
**a "carriage" ride for 2 behind a bicycle (that college student was in great shape...he pulled both of us)
**scenic drive up M119
**visit to a local organic farm and got to see 5 day old piglets
**walks at sunset
**walks on the pier, and the harbor, and the dunes, and downtown
**early morning run with the waves crashing into the shore and surprising little waterfalls trickling down the bluffs
**learning 2 person pinochle
**banangrams (need i say more)
**good (local) wine, great (local) cheese, and excellent coffee
**super tasty dinners
**late night (for us) NBA championship
**our first experience watching world cup soccer (surpringly fun)
**a surprise visit to see my cousin on our way north (we went right through her town--might as well stop) :)
**long talks
**lots of laughter and smiles
**huge desserts
**"tousist" treats for the boys--fudge, fudge, fudge
**finding a very fun oil and vinnegar shop
**reading

a few pictures for you:

we love this ceiling tile and want to do the same thing in our basement..... some day :)

 

 

Our view from the cabin

Baby Fever!!!!

i have baby fever....not me popping out a baby this time :) we are excited to announce that josh's sister, sarah, and her husband aaron are expecting their first child! we cannot wait until the end of january/beginning of february!

yay for us being an aunt and uncle (again) :)

Feeling like a Crummy Mom

the start of summer is tough for me every year--it might be because i am a creature of habit and this is a "new" start every year, or it might be because i am a structured person and the start of summer is not quite structured like i would like it or it might be just because it is hard for me for all of the above (my guess is all of the above).

i tend to do a lot with my boys--this is good, yes i know :) we go on "field trips", play (a lot), do playdough, spend time outdoors, eat out, visit people, etc. we are busy almost every day. this leads to not enough down time for me :) the boys still get their down time--i make sure we are home for part or all of the day but when they are getitng their "rest" i am still doing 110 other things--cleaning, cleaning, cleaning or making food, making food, making food :) i don't think we are over scheduled. i do think that i like to be doing stuff with the boys the entire day and don't take even a few minutes to myself. once a week i take an entire day to me--but again, that day is not scheduled for fun, it is time to do things around here--for example, tomorrow is to get the basement cleaned up (including both boys' rooms) and vacuum the entire house, as well as unpack from my fun weekend....etc. because i take an entire day, perhaps i (subconsciously) think that i cannot take a few minutes in a day to myself when the boys are here.  yes i know, that thinking is completely false and it is healthy to take time to me even when the boys are here--they need to see that they can entertain themselves AND that mommy has things she wants/has to do as well. 

so here is the crummy mom part for today--i am frustrated and angry with myself....i got tired and then got frustrated with the boys because i was tired. yes they were more trying than usual this afternoon, yes they were pushing my buttons (probably on purpose) but i did not have to "snap" at them in frustration. instead of getting angry at them for not picking up their toys, i am mad at myself for not making them pick up their toys and not teaching them to pick up their toys. today i am also mad at myself for not communicating more clearly so they can see a good model of communication when they are frustrated---i am so frustrated with myself today.

i get a lot of mom guilt--and right now my mom guilt is mostly because we ended the day with me being upset with myself and then being upset with the boys. instead of getting to try it all again tomorrow, it is a daycare day and i am feeling guilty that they are going instead of me toughing it out and working through my own frustration.

sigh i had days when i feel like a crummy mom. overall i know i am doing a good job and i work REALLY hard at being the best mom i can be.....   when the boys went to bed tonight, both smiled at me and asked if i still loved them even when they are naughty--of course i respoded with always :) i then asked if they still love me even when i am naughty--luckily both yes said yes!

thanks for listening to my long and rambling post.

PS kudos to you stay at home moms--i admire you greatly!

Love my Luke :)

conversation at breakfast this morning: 

Luke, "I ate good"
Me, "you sure did!"
Luke, "Can I have dessert then?"
Me, "No honey, it is breakfast time not supper time"
...long pause
Luke, "Then I will call this supper" :)

Deep Thoughts with Jack

tonight felt like "deep thoughts with jack handy"....for those of you old enough and cool enough to remember SNL skits! :)

as i put jack to bed, he was on a roll with conversation....started with him asking about how boats are made...which led to his favorite friend sarah benny (who knows all and can tell him how boats are made)....which led to him saying he loves sarah benny....and that led to him saying he loves cousin benny and from there the conversation got a whole heck of a lot deeper. he was thinking about benny and his mom jan...then asked if ben's mom was ever going to die and i said i hope not....jack asked why and i replied because that is ben's mom and he already lost his dad he needs his mom more than ever. jack agreed and then asked if jan did die, if she would have her funeral at the same church that uncle tom did....and that led to him trying to describe the "church" (which turns out was the funeral home not the church) and i am amazed at the details he could give me....he even described parts of the burial for my grandma from a year ago! he is such a perceptive little fella and has such deep thoughts.

My Wise Aunt Mary

My Aunt Mary, my dad's sister, is very wise and I love her so much :) Life gets complicated and her response to me.....

Nobody ever said it would be easy - challenging, joyful, sad, delightful, boring, puzzling, heartfelt ...always different and sometimes complicated!

35 Years!!!

Happy 35th Annivesary to my Parents! 

They are a huge inspiration to me! 

May they have MANY more years of such beautiful and unconditional love!

A Year--Short Blurp to Add

a year ago tomorrow (tuesday), tom was a huge strength for our family as we made the hard decision to take grandma off of life support. he was so amazing for our mom and grandpa--they leaned on him and he stoically supported us all. i still remember him standing in grandma's room as she passed on and he cried and cried. he loved her so much. i am touched by the love he had for her and that he (finally) openly showed it. it is still unbelievable that 4 short months later, he would be gone.

A Year

It has been a year since my grandma died, June 8, 2009. I cannot believe how fast that year went. I am so aware of how short life is and how it should not be taken for granted. I can't formulate the words right now that I want to share....her death in an odd way really brought Lynda, Tom and I closer together. We spent so much time together when she was in the ICU and it hurts to think that just a year ago we were whole--we were ALL there..... so instead I will post the eulogy I gave at her funeral, June 12th, 2009. 

Welcome. I am Teresa Boyer and the granddaughter of Bill and Sharon. It is an honor for me to stand before you and celebrate the life of my grandma.

Sharon had so many names and titles. To the love of her life, she was sweetie. To her children she was mom. To her grandchildren she was Grandma Johnson. To her great grandchildren she was great grandma, grandma down the road and grandma beep beep. She was also a daughter, sister, niece, aunt and great aunt. Even though she had so many titles and names for different people, all who knew her called her friend.

My grandma was a true friend and it was in her nature to give of her friendship unconditionally.  It didn’t matter who you were or how you knew her, she gave you that wonderful gift of unconditional love. When I was a child, I spent many of my waking hours down at my grandma’s house. We spent so much of our time playing card games and tic tac toe. She shared so many of her talents with me including her love of gardening and sewing, but more importantly her love of life.  Looking back now and reflecting on that special time I was able to spend with my grandma, I realize she was not only spending her time with me; she was guiding me through life with her unconditional love. Grandma cared so deeply for all of the people around her and I am so blessed to be able to say that she really has instilled this wonderful characteristic in me. For the past 11 years, grandma wrote me a weekly letter. For 9 of those years, my sister Lynda also received a weekly letter. She worked so hard to make sure to stay in touch with us even though we moved away to college and on with our adult lives. She shared her love so freely with us.  I thank God for those precious letters and I, as well as my sister, will cherish them always.  They will be a lasting reminder of her unconditional love for us.

My grandma had a fantastic personality and sense of humor. She had a great way of making others smile. When my brother was a kid he used to go down to my grandparents with his wagon. He would tell them the sad tale of not having vegetables at his house.  My grandma just felt sorry for him and would load up his wagon with as much produce as they had from their garden. One day, my mom finally asked Grandma about this. Grandma just smiled and replied, "Well we didn’t want him to not eat his veggies!" Her smile was absolutely contagious and lit up the entire room. One Christmas, as she was getting frailer, she let her great grandson Ben play with her cane. (Ben persisted and asked until he got to play with it). As Ben went out around and tried to bop others with her cane, she just burst into laughter and couldn’t stop laughing at the sight.  Just thinking of her laughing at Ben brings a smile to my face.

My grandma was a talented woman! In fact, she had so many talents it is hard to even know where to start. She was very talented at sewing. She used to make many quilts and luckily most of the grandchildren have at least 2.  My favorite quilt she made me was my pink Strawberry shortcake quilt that I still have and use to this day! She also spent many hours sewing projects for the Selma Township Women’s Auxiliary group. In her later years, when her arthritis decreased the use of her hands, she stopped sewing for awhile but started back up with making bibs when her great grandchildren came along. Grandma also loved to write letters! This was apparent not only by the thousands of letters she wrote Lynda and me but also by the number of letters she wrote to her sisters and dear friends.

She also was an avid bird watcher, a fire warden for the US Forest Service, loved to do crossword puzzles, and was talented at bookkeeping. As my grandpa said, it was her bag! She enjoyed it so much that she spent over 13 years as the Selma Township Treasurer—after retiring from her “real job”. In her spare time, she also enjoyed gardening and when it became too difficult for her to do the actual gardening, she turned over the duties to grandpa and promoted herself to supervisor of gardening.

My grandma had a frail body but not a frail spirit. What is amazing to me is that many people do not know how difficult daily life activities were for my grandma. They did not know because she never complained—Ever! In fact, after visiting with others who were older, grandma usually responded to my mom, or her sisters that “so and so” is so much worse off than her and she was hoping they got better. She truly thought her crippling arthritis could not be as bad as others had it and said there was nothing she could do about it so she just made the best of it.

I am inspired daily by my grandma. She was so sweet, thoughtful and cheerful that when I see the sunshine through my windows, I will think of my grandma. When I am having a tough time and struggling to get through something, I will think of the strength my grandma had in life and use that to push forward. I will work hard to share the unconditional love she gave so many others. I know she will want us to celebrate her life and look forward. She will want us to make the most of our lives and use the talents God gave us.

Thank you.

Weekly Menu

Saturday: Grilled Chicken Breasts, Paula Dean Marinated Tomatoes (See below), Fruit Salad, Bread

Sunday: Basil Shrimp with Orzo, Bread (see previous post for recipe), Fresh Pineapple 

Monday: Grilled Spinach and Asiago Chicken Sausages, Asparagus, Wild Rice

Tuesday: Salads with Sliced Chicken Patties on Top, Fruit Salad

Wednesday: Balsamic and Garlic Roasted Pork Tenderloin, Corn on the Cob and Roasted Potatoes

Thursday: Marinated Round Steak, Veggie Kabobs (peppers, onions, tomatoes and mushrooms), Bread

Friday: Mini Stromboli

Marinaded Tomatoes:

Ingredients

• 3 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley leaves
• 1 tablespoon sugar
• 1 1/2 teaspoons garlic salt
• 1 1/2 teaspoons seasoned salt
• 1/2 teaspoon ground pepper
• 3/4 teaspoon dried thyme
• 3/4 cup vegetable oil
• 1/2 cup red wine vinegar
• 2 to 3 green onions, chopped
• 4 to 6 large tomatoes, each cut into 6 wedges

Directions

Combine all ingredients, except tomatoes, in a large measuring cup or mixing bowl. Whisk well. Place tomatoes in a resealable plastic bag and pour marinade over. Marinate at room temperature for up to 2 hours, turning the bag occasionally.

Review of the Basil Shrimp Meal

AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you like shrimp, you are bound to like this recipe!

Ingredients

• 1  regular-size foil oven bag
• Cooking spray
• 1/2  cup  uncooked orzo (rice-shaped pasta)
• 2  teaspoons  olive oil, divided
• 1  cup  diced tomato
• 3/4  cup  sliced green onions
• 1/2  cup  (2 ounces) crumbled feta cheese
• 1/2  teaspoon  grated lemon rind
• 1  tablespoon  fresh lemon juice
• 1/4  teaspoon  salt
• 1/4  teaspoon  black pepper
• 3/4  pound  large shrimp, peeled and deveined
• 1/4  cup  chopped fresh basil

Preparation

Preheat oven to 450°.
Coat inside of oven bag with cooking spray. Place the bag on a large shallow baking pan.
Cook the pasta in boiling water 5 minutes, omitting salt and fat; drain. Place the pasta in a large bowl. Stir in 1 teaspoon oil and next 7 ingredients (1 teaspoon oil through pepper). Place the orzo mixture in prepared oven bag. Combine shrimp and basil. Arrange shrimp mixture on orzo mixture. Fold edge of bag over to seal. Bake at 450° for 25 minutes or until the shrimp are done. Cut open bag with a sharp knife, and peel back the foil. Drizzle with 1 teaspoon oil.

I tweaked it slightly:

I did not have a foil bag so I made my own
At the end I opened it up, sprinkled a tiny bit of parmesean on top and broiled it
I did not drizzle it with oil at the end

Next time:

I will add a touch less lemon juice

Overall--excellent!

The Muffin Man

We have a local diner that we frequent often for breakfast....perhaps a little too often :) We do not need a menu when we go and our favorite waitress knows just what our boys like for food, sides and drink. The food is amazingly fresh and homemade. 

A few months ago, our boys were squirrely when we were there so I occupied our time by pointing out that you can see into the kitchen (yes small town America at its best). The boys were enthralled by the fella back there who were mixing up a batch of homemade biscuits. We saw them cut each biscuit by hand and lay them out on a greased sheet. The boys were convinced the bus boy (probably late high school age) was one of the fellas making the biscuits (which I do not think he was) but from that day on, my boys referred to him as "The Muffin Man".  As we enter the  diner, the boys greet him every time as The Muffin Man (I did step aside and tell him the story one day so he knows why they call him this) and he always responds to them. This has continued for quite a while and the boys love when the Muffin Man talks to them. He often stops by to say hello but does not make much conversation--just a hello and a smile. 

This morning the boys and I took a date. Josh ran errands in GR so the little fellas and I headed in town to have a hearty breakfast at our favorite haunt. Of course the boys saw their friend and yelled out, "hi Muffin Man" and of course he responded back with a smile and nod. As we at our breakfast, the Muffin Man came over and placed a package of Blueberry Muffins on our table. He smiled and said, "here's a little treat of muffins from the Muffin Man". The boys were TICKLED pink! What a sweet and sincere gesture from the Muffin Man. That small kind act made my day! 

Thank you Muffin Man!

Trying to Explain

rhetorical question: how do i explain to my boys that they can't see their cousin because his mom doesn't want us to see him....

i tried to explain this to jack as gently as i could and as tactfully as possible. i did not want to bad mouth anyone but i also did not want to lie. jack deserves the truth and so i gave him the "condensed tomato soup" version of it. i explained to him that ben's mommy does not want him around us (all of us--including grandma and grandpa) right now. he asked why and i said, well honey perhaps she worries that he will get hurt somehow. jack's response to that was, "maybe she is worried he will think about his dad who died".  oh to hear jack say that just tugged at my heart. i believe that jack is on to something with that comment. ben, autistic or not, needs to grieve. i have no clue how much his mommy talks about tom or if they even do. i have made many phone calls and sent letters/pictures/hand made boys' drawings and have gotten 0 response. my mom and sister have done the same. our phone calls are not returned.

it hurts to know we lost tom but it hurts even more to know that we have lost ben. ben is alive and well and it hurts so much to think that we are not allowed to be a part of his life. i cannot fathom a reason that he would be taken from us..... prayers please for our family as we continue to struggle with this.

Children Make Things All Better

on my run tonight i got agitated--very agitated. normally my route is peaceful as i run over gently rolling hills, both on dirt roads and back country paved roads. tonight however, my peaceful run was rude interrupted by the sound of a loud motorcycle. as i turned the corner and headed down the tree canopy covered dirt road, i could hear it revving up behind me. as it passed me moving very quickly, it was apparent that the fella had no regards for me, the runner, on the side of the road. he sped past and went away as quickly as he came. a sigh of relief fell over me and once again i felt safe as i continued my run. no more than 3 minutes passed when this same driver came roaring down the paved country road and zoomed past me again. not only was he driving extremely fast, he was also driving completely in the middle of the road--closer to my side than his own. oh that just agitated me! it causes me worries not just because i could be hurt on my run, but also because there are many small children and animals that live on those roads (including my own) that could be gravely injured if they were out near the road or if the driver lost control of his motorcycle. in my mind that one motorcycle tonight stood for all who drive like idiots in our "country neighborhood".

well this anger i felt certainly made me run faster tonight and as i got home, i was still fuming. in fact i was getting ready to sit down  and write this blog about how people are irritating me and that i had a terrible run because of that one person....but as i walked in the door, i heard luke on the stairs. luke was put to bed while i was on my run but as he climbed up the stairs (being naughty i might add), his sweet little voice asked me, "how was your run mama?".  that sweet little voice was all i needed for my agitated manner to melt away and remember that my run was not ruined and it was still a beautiful run on a beautiful early summer night. i am still upset by poor drivers in our area but realize that i can still enjoy life, even when not that great of things happened.